Thank You!

Okay, its thanksgiving. So what if it's a "western" concept. Nothing wrong with reminders that gratitude (feeling it and expressing it) is a part of what makes us human.

I have many, many things to be grateful for. Many things. And in the true spirit, I'm going to get to it, it no particular order.

My husband. Thanks, P. During the good times, I'm thankful to have you around. During the bad times, I'm thankful that I am learning new things about life and marriage.

My Friends. I love you. Each one of you. My family, my critics, well-wishers, irritants, voices of reason. You have been so much to me. I think you guys are superhuman.

My Dad. Self explanatory.

Bath and Body Works. This scrub is to die for. Though I'm glad I don't have to.

Modern air-travel. That enabled my brother-in-law to get said scrub for me.

My weird eidetic memory. (Not always, but when I remember things, I remember minor details within minor details).

Google, Wikipedia and search engines, for giving me gems like this recipe. Can't wait to try it out.

My willpower.

Chyavanprash. It's helping with my immunity and metabolism.

My mother-in-law.

My job.

My car.

My ability to cherish intangible things along with my material possessions.

What are you thankful for?

The White Car syndrome

Any Indian will know what I mean(It's definitely not the best content for a post after a gap of almost a year-and-a-half, but oh well. Whatever.). Most Indians do not buy white cars.

If you ask someone who was born before the 80's, white cars are for taxis. Black cars are for people who don't believe in God, rich kids and/or yuppies who don't listen to their parents, or people who just want to seem cool.

Just this morning, as I was getting back home from the local monastery I visit Sunday mornings (another post about that, later), I stopped at a traffic intersection next to a white car. With he dreaded yellow plates. And the even more dreaded paan stains on the drivers side. YECHH. Jumping the red light and paying the fine would have been totally worth it but for the other stupid car blocking my way.

And then there was these two white color high end cars down the street. (I'm sorry, but a Honda Civic IS an upmarket car in India). Maybe there was hope somewhere, to see these shiny, well maintained ... nice cars driving around.

Which brings me to part two of my rant - why are red cars more attractive? Whats with "when I grow up, I want a red Ferrari). Hmm I wonder what the kids would be tutored to say if we saw red taxis in our country.

Well the positive side is, I see blue cabs on the streets nowadays. Definitely a break from the monotone of white. The downside: I can't buy a blue car, either.

The Skinny Bitches

About two weeks ago, I visited a bookstore to buy a farewell present for a colleague. As it happens with me and bookstores, I had to spend a couple hours going through various shelves, picking up books at random, and reading at least some pages of at least some books.

This one, in particular caught my attention. of course, the cover and the language talked to me.

And then it got a lot more colorful. These ladies went on to talk about why meat is gross, milk is for babies, and also uninhibitedly discussed... err... excretion being a good metric of whether or not you are eating right. OK.

They tore apart the joys of sugar, soda, tea, coffee, in short, anything that any major publication says is bad for you. Still OK.

And then comes the part that stole my appetite. Completely. A diet regiment that advocates only fruits in the morning, and a moderately heavy dinner, with lots of tofu and "healthy, non-crappy food that's SO good for you, that it tastes great without making you fat". That was also tolerable.

But what was not was the countless allusion of the "fat reader". The way I saw it, it was almost like glorifying a lifestyle that pays you millions of dollars to NOT eat. I understand these women have a respectable profession of working for a modelling agency and of course, modelling. What I don't understand is why they had to justify that by ordering - yes, literally ordering thousands of women around the world to be the same way.

We understand, that you poor women cannot eat cheese and yogurt. Pity. We understand eating tofu increases your paycheque by 5 figures. What a fantastic life you must lead, one of depravity. And if this is not enough, Kim Barnouin has a Skinny Bitch guide for pregnant women. Fantastic!

Having been on an almost 5-year quest to shed pounds, I have done a lot of exploring around for diet and exercise options that would make me lose excess weight without my colleagues having to rush me to a hospital for IV feeding. The operative word here being excess. I do not wish to be a skinny bitch, because my income doesn't depend on my dress size. But none of those books and blogs made me feel .. well, like a bitch for enjoying my occasional milkshake. None of those made me feel like having a warm grandmom-made meal (the taste of which has a lot to do with the oils and spices that go into it) was "crap" going into my body (for the record, my Grandma is 79, fit, can climb 6 floors of stairs without losing her breath, and walk at least 3 kms at a stretch).

Yes, these are two good-looking women. Ignorant good looking women who want so badly to believe that what is necessary for them is good for other women. Whose self-confidence and self esteem seems to be embedded only in a weighing scale. Sigh.

Apparently beauty is not just skin-deep anymore. Beauty lies in the body than in your brains, heart, or even your face. Absolutely!

And that attitude is what makes you the (skinny - who cares?) Bitches.

The Simple Life

Okay. So I am in the "addicted to Farmville" club. Level 37, I have no further milestones to achieve, yet my harvests are synced with my watch in almost scientific precision.

It all started when I saw my news feed - "Aparna has left the city living to become a farmer". Yippiee!! I was so happy. I lost myself in my crops, my trees, and overnight, I didn't just become a farmer, but also an animal lover, a tree hugger, a Sultan of Soil, a Barnyard Behemoth, oh, and an extremely gifted landscape artiste.

But think about it fairly. Whats so bad about an RPG that makes you utilize amazing abilities that you don't even have in real? If non-existent talents can help you attain a signboard on your property that says "Preminum Grapes grown here" , what's so bad? How many times in real life can you expand your land by 80 square feet at a rate of almost once a month? How many people in real life, with just an internet connection and nothing else, own villas, greenhouses, cottages, lodges, and estates on one large piece of land? Heck, how many of us have even dreamt of a piece of land large enough to house all of the above together?

Come to think of it, I would encourage young kids to watch their crops grow, gift flower bouquets to friends, pet their pigs and their baby turkeys, rather than letting them get a whiff of RPG's like "Rapelay" (yes, it unfortunately exists).

Maybe the popularity of Farmville was not its game method, but what it brings out of ourselves - simple, yet lavish living and hordes of neighbors bearing you gifts on a 12-hour basis. Maybe for most of us, it's an escape into an alternate reality we know we can never have, bot secretly crave.

I'd better go harvest those blueberries.....

The Candlelight Club

Last evening, I cried. Today morning, I cried again. I hear these words, and my lachrymal glands start to work overtime.

Woman: "These candles, what does it mean?"
Man: "You'll find out. Lets dance now"

These lines are from the movie "Waterloo Bridge (1940). They don't make movies like that anymore. Romance doesn't happen like that anymore. You don't see love like that anymore. You hardly even see restaurants like that anymore. Couples don't dance like that anymore.

We have a very dashing, charming, handsome Robert Taylor and a beautiful Vivian Leigh holding each other with only the slightest of touches and dancing. This happens at a place named "the Candlelight Club". Three men playing the violin to the tune of "Auld Lang Syne" , with candles lit in front of them, complete the picture. At one point, the men intently play, and take one look at the crowd, and swiftly albeit delicately put out the candles. Screen fades to black, while the two continue to dance. The only guiding light they have is each others eyes.

In the darkness, you then hear the strains of the song........

My mind fades to the rude shock of 2009. I sit in a "coffee bar" that tries to include the concept of outdoor seating irrespective of the location. I hear the blaring noises of the traffic going by. I look around, see a young couple loudly singing along to something on the lines of 'My life would suck without you". All the while desperately trying to count the change in each others pockets using their toes. or hands. Or both.

I'm almost gasping at the change 6 decades have brought about. Three generations. Innocence lost. Loving glances turning to lustful stares. Waltzing in each others arms turning to frantic one night stands. Stolen Smiles turning to bawdy pick-up lines. When did all this happen? Where did the purity of true love get lost? I try to process all this information, and I'm left wondering.

Was the 40's a time of total sexual deprivation and suppression that primal thoughts had to come bursting out in the open someday, or is the 21st century a time of total deprivation of innocence and romantic cleanliness? Are we not allowed to be sweet anymore? Are we so busy trying to fit into the kinky schoolgirl's uniform that the snug headmistress' wrap chokes us? Are we so busy trying to pretend we dont have earnest feelings, to a point where we cannot get them to the surface anymore?

Close your eyes, mentally light a candle and touch the hand of someone you love. Put out the candle, open your eyes and tell me what you see.

I see a teardrop.

I do...

The story of US...

This one goes out to the five of us.

28th January, 2009:
Bangalore, India: One is slogging away at work, and checking mails.
Kolkata, India: One just got married! and is busy settling things, and she checks mail whenever possible.
New Delhi, India: One has quit her work to relocate and keeps checking mail every 20 seconds. When she gets new mail, she gets into action immediately.
London, United Kingdom: One is on a project, and is mailing us to fill in whatever details we might have missed out on her life.
Somewhere over the India Ocean (on a flight back from he Maldives): One is just getting back from her honeymoon and in her head is composing the text message that she will send out to her girls.

Less than 2 years back:
-We were all unmarried
-We were all students
-We were all in one place, under one roof, and had the same kind of lifestyles.
-We would share table, plates, cutlery, food, books, and showers.

Now:
-We have jobs
-We have husbands
-We have lives in different places
-We have routines, schedules, responsibilities.

But....
-We still talk junk.
-We are still "tuned in"
-We dont need to see each other to "connect" we just do.
-We dont even need to hear each others voices to "connect". We just do.
-We always have someone we can discuss Cosmo's "special sections" with.
-We always have someone who will give us HONEST reviews on our clothes, shoes, hair and weight.

Thank God for my girlfriends!! No one makes them like that anymore :)
Do we.... each other.. take each other.... to love and respect, for richer or for poorer, for single and for married, in bloated and in 26-inch waist thin....

I DO!!!!

The Perfect New Year

Three days to go, for a brand new year.
A brand new date.
A brand new day.
A new sunrise.
A new path I want to take.

But it is today
that's completely new

Just being here, with you.